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User blog:SkeepTieel/ERB Deathmatch - Trailer and 1000 Edits! yey
Yo, it's SkeepSkeep! I'm here to show you a preview of my new comedy series; The ERB Deathmatch. (Based off the The Hunger Games and a comment chain about this) I also recently got 1000 edits, so thats yey. I would to thank all the people I talked to, made friends with and argued. The actual first episode is not even half to finished, and this pilot is like a tenth of the size of an actual episode. This is my first attempt at trying to be funny without being too random, so please give me all your feedbacks and suggestions for the series. I would like ideas for who should die, who shouldn't die, personallities for characters, plot ideas and all that jazz. So, enjoy the crappy little pilot I wrote in 10 minutes: Pilot Part 1 - The Start Camera zooms into Pete and Lloyd, who is sitting in a small enclosed red recording studio with only two chairs and a microphone hanging from the ceiling. No one says anything. ... ... ... Peter: So, Lloyd, have you ever thought about how we're going to dispose all these useless ERB characters? (Peter points to a window where all the previous ERB characters are all piled up in a big heap.) Stay Puft: (on the top of the pile) Yo. Lloyd: Nope, but we should get rid of them. They're starting to creep me out. (Hannibal Lecter is behind Lloyd, poking and prodding his bald head) Hannibal Lecter: Hm. Peter: They're getting more annoying than creepy now. (Mario and Luigi are playing Super Mario Bros in the background. They fall off a cloud and die. They are mad. Really mad.) Lloyd: They just broke the fucking TV. How the hell I am going to watch My Little Pony now? Peter: You watch that shit? Lloyd: Um... No, I didn't say anything. Peter: God. Napoleon Dynamite: God. Zeus: God. Thor: God. God: God Lloyd: Fuck off, you weren't in an ERB God: k. Lloyd: I wish I could beat the living crap out of everyone. And get some pizza. Peter: Wait, Lloyd, that's it! Lloyd: Yeah, I need that pizza. (Lloyd holds up phone) Lloyd: Bacon pizza... Oh, Pete, extra large fries or extra extra large fries? Peter: NO TIME FOR STUPID QUESTIONS LLOYD. WE NEED BOTH. Lloyd: Sure. Peter: Come-on, Lloyd, we got to plan out the official ERB Deathmatches. Lloyd: But my pizz- Peter: FUCK THE PIZZA TO JULIET'S COURTYARD LETS GO EVERYONE NOW NOW NOW GET OFF YOUR LAZY ASS AND FOLLOW ME Stay Puft: Me? Peter: YES YOU. (Everyone follows Peter. Pete is preparing some props and weapons for the deathmatch) Peter: Lloyd, food supplies? Lloyd: Check Peter: So, ranged weapons, guns, bows, this mushroom? Lloyd: Check Peter: Giant ship? Lloyd: Check. Kirk: Hey, that's... mine. (Peter ignores Kirk) Lloyd: I think we're done. Peter: Lloyd, follow me. (Lloyd follows Peter into a dark basement. Peter flips a small switch and reveals a control room with a bunch of levers, monitors and button things.) Lloyd: Is this...? Are we doing this? Peter: Yes... I think it's time. Also, where's the pizza? Lloyd: YOU DIDN'T LET ME ORDER IT YOU MOTHERFU- Peter: Shhh, Lloyd. We must introduce the teams. (Both of them walk outside into a crowd of ERB contestants) Part 2 - Flip Kari (All the ERB participants are in a big crowd and huddled in a small courtyard) NicePeter is dressed as that pale creepy lady and Lloyd is just wearing his regular clothes. Lloyd: Dude, why are you dressed like that? Lady Gaga (shouts from the crowd): Cause he's a gay-ass crossdresser Peter: Hmph! Lloyd: Okay, okay, lets do what we came here for. Stay Puft (Outside the courtyard): To blaze chumps and flip Kari butter-side up? Kari: Hey?! Peter: No, we are here to choose the teams for the official ERB Hanger Gumes Joan of Arc: You mean the districts for the ERB Hunger Games? Lloyd: No, the 'Hanger Gumes.' We don't want to be sued. Stay Puft: Can I flip Kari? Kari, Lloyd and Joan: No! Peter: For Team 1, we have Hitler, Stalin, Kim Jong-il and Khan. (They all come up to Pete and Lloyd's stand.) Hitler: WE ARE TEAM SIEG HEIL! Peter: I didn't say we could choose names- Hitler: SIEG HEIL! Lloyd: You're team Tyrant Dick-tactors Khan: You are Russian, so it's clear that you're a Nazi. Stalin: I'll bitch slap you. Hitler: I AM HITLAH! Stay Puft: FLIP KARI! Peter: SHUT UP! God. God, Zeus and Thor: Someone say Go- Peter: NEXT TEAM! Lloyd: We have Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, Ellen DeGeneres and Kayne West. (All of them come up) Peter: You are team Mus- Kayne: Yo, I'mma let you finish, but Team Kayne West is the Kayne Best is by far the greatest name ever. Peter: You are now Team Shut the Fuck Up. Justin: Yo, I'm the better raper, yo. Kayne: Yo, thats racist, yo. Boba Fett and Goku: I wanna do some raping! Peter: Team 3, Kari, Tory, Grant, Bay and Hulk Hogan Miley Cyrus: Why the hell do they get extra 2 people? Lloyd: Tory can't rap and Bay makes terrible movies. Bay: CUT! That was not in the script! We don't even have a script! Tory: Dude, I love your movies. Bay: Fuck you, random guy I don't know! Tory: but Michael Bay: GIVE ME ALL YOUR MOTHERFUCKING MONEY! Tory: yay Puft: I'M FLIPPING KARI! (Puft flips Kari butterside up, resulting in her neck snapping and her toast flipping the wrong way.) Lloyd: Okay, one person dead. Team Kari is Dead. Grant: May I eat the toast? Lloyd: Team 4, Shakespheare, Romeo, Stanley Kubrick and HAL9000 Romeo: Excuse thy host, I cannot be separated by my lover, for, we are to be never seperated, even from death! Kubrick: That's sweet, now go fuck yourself. Romeo: Excuse me? HAL9000: My programming suggests that we should burn Shakespheare's works, as they are very amateurish and incompetent Shakespheare: Get this piece of junk out of thy sight! Lloyd: Oh boy. NicePeter: Team 5, Bob Ross, The Easter Bunny, Dr. Seuss, Thor, Zeus, Luigi, Young Michael Jackson, Skrillex and Mr. Rogers. McFeely: He isn't here today. EpicLloyd: Oh, yeah yeah, he's gone. NicePeter: What happened? Lloyd: I'll tell you later. Cyrus: What the fuck? That's extremely unbalanced! NicePeter: Face it; Bob Ross ain't gon do shit, The Easter Bunny will be roadkill, Seuss is a mute, Thor and Zeus are legos, Young Michael Jackson is gonna get curbstomped, Skrillex is not that much of a Scary Monster, he's just a Nice Sprite and Rogers ain't here. Cyrus: But there's too much people. Lloyd: Kayne West is moved to this team now Cyrus: YOU MOTHERFUCKER Lloyd: Okay, he's back on your team. Luigi: What bout Luigi? Everyone: Who? Mario: That's Weegee, my unnessecary fat brother. Luigi: That's MAMA Luigi to you, Mario. Neil DeGrasse: Seriously, who is this retarded douchebag? Everyone: Yeah?! Lloyd: I don't think he was in an ERB, was he a cameo? Peter: I'm checking the wikia... it doesn't say anything about a 'Luigi' Luigi: Screw you, I'mma gonna win. Both Donatellos, Michael Bay, Justin Bieber and Bill Gates: BULLSHIT! I'll win! Lloyd: This is dragging on too long, how bout we just do a free for all? All: That sounds good. Stay Puft: Kari's dead ;-; All: NOBODY CARES Peter: All aboard the Enterprise, we're going to the arena and inject some little microchip trackers into your skin. Kubrick: Aren't you going to be in the deathmatch? Peter and Lloyd: HAH! Bitch please. Lloyd: Norris, tie up Puft on the top of the ship and lock the competitors in the hold. Kirk: Hey... this is, my ship, yo. Peter: ERB property now. Kirk: Okay ;-; Norris: I AM CHUCK FUCKING NORRIS (Norris accidently locks everyone in) Norris: oops. Loki: Noirse going, Norris. Norris: Chuck Norris doesn't apologise to anyone Lloyd: EVERYONE KILL NORRIS Norris: Wait, what? (Everyone charges at Norris, and proceeds to rip Norris' limbs and organs out, only leaving a pile of blood and gore) Hannibal Lecter: Mmm, delicious... (...everyone backs away) Miley Cyrus: Ey, you guys are scared of a puny cannibal? (Miley Cyrus starts feasting on Norris with Hannibal) Peter: So... the deathmatch hasn't even started and we've already had two deaths. HAL9000: 3. (HAL hijacks the ship and tilts it to the side, launching Isaac Newton through the wall) Lloyd: Why kill Weird Al- I mean Newton?! Isaac: I'm still here. Lloyd: WHAT THE FUCK? HAL9000: Logic sense do not compute I repeat Not compute. (HAL starts to glitch out, the ship's walls begin to spark, the ship starts to shake.) Newton: According to my calculations, we're about to crash soon. Watson: No shit, Sherlock. Sherlock: Hey. Jamie: Hey. Kari: Hey! Stay Puft: OH MY GOD A GHOST! (Stay Puft flips Kari and once again, she dies.) Peter: GODDAMNIT, THAT WAS A COSPLAYER. (The ship starts to malfunction, Kirk keeps beaming up and down. Great job, Scotty.) Kirk: Help (BZZT) me (BZZT) you (BZZT) sons (BZZT) of (BZZT) bitches (BZZT) (Kirk ends up not coming back) Lloyd: He's probably dead. (Tension rises as the ship starts to crumble. BOOM! A room exploded. BOOM! My potato exploded BOOM! The TV exploded) Lloyd: GODDAMNIT THAT'S NOT IN OUR BUDGET (A final explosion rekts the ship. The ship is going down.) Peter: We're going to die. (Everyone screams. Luigi screams like a pussy. ... ... ... Suddenly the ship is hoisted up and is safely.) Lloyd: Oh, nevermind. (Luigi goes pink) ???: You can all thank me. Lloyd: who is that ???: It's me. Mike Schmit. AKA, Mexican Stephen Hawkins JK I'm just regular Stephen Hawkins Peter: Are you playing Angry Birds?! Stephen Hawkins: Yes with the power of Angry Birds we can do anything. We can write emotional stories. We can be geniuses. We can revive a whole ship. We can even fly; watch. (Stephen Hawkins slowly heads towards the ship's exit. Rolling in his wheelchair. Slowly. Slowly. And he's there. Stephen Hawkins attempts to open the door, before-) HAL9000: Oop, excuse me. (HAL takes over Stephen Hawkins' wheelchair.) Stephen HALKINS9000: fuck you bastards I'm Stephen Hawking now Barisnikov: Actually, his name is Stephen Hawkins Stephen HALkins: fuck you PewDiePie PewDs: k ;-; Stay Puft: Are we there yet? Peter: Why don't you go and check? Stay Puft: Okay. (Stay Puft crashes his head through the roof, checking for the arena.) Stay Puft: I see a dome thing, is that it? Lloyd: Why yes. Yes it i- Peter: OH GOD WE'RE FALLING (The ship is once again crashing, but now it's heading towards the dome faster.) Kari: Quickly! We must go inside Stay Puft's marshmallow body to soften the landing! Stay Puft: OH GOD ANOTHER GHOST (Stay Puft launches Kari through the roof and into the sun.) Grant: Looks like Team Rocket is blasting off again. Peter: BRACE FOR IMPAC- CRASH! END OF EPISODE 0 TO BE CONTINUED Did you enjoy this? Smh, needs more work Kinda sucks A bit rushed It was okay, I guess. Noice, m8 Needs more Lloyd Needs more Peter Needs more Stay Puft Marshmallow Man Stay Puft is ye FUCK YOU ZEUS WILL WIN So, the episodes will be centered around a certain ERB character. Who should have an episode? Stay Puft Marshmallow Man Justin Bieber Mozart and Beethoven Hannibal Lecter William Wallace Mr. McFeely Jack the Ripper Adolf Hitler All the Gods/OP people Link and Freddy Fazbear (lel) Lady Gaga Master Chief Edgar Allan Poe Ellen The Cat in the Hat NicePeter and EpicLLOYD Walter White John Lennon Abraham Lincoln Bruce Lee Putin Young Michael Jackson Kayne West Macho Man Stephen Hawking and HAL9000 The Easter Bunny Napoleon Dynamite Vince Offer Dumbledore Spock Luigi and Princess Peach KassemG Freddy Mercury Obama One of the Doctors Watson. Just Watson Santa Claus Steve One of the Protesters Nikola Tesla Babe Ruth Edward Kenway Lump. Just Lump. Kurt Hugh Neutr- never mind Muhammad Ali Jimmy Olsen Weird Al- I mean Isaac Newton Donatello. Both of them. Juliet. Just Juliet. Dane Cook Stanley Kubrick Michael Bay Category:Blog posts